


I have love on my skin, but emptiness in my heart

by notacompletelunatic



Category: Naruto
Genre: Light Angst, M/M, One-Sided Gaara/Naruto, Romantic Gaara, don't really know, first fanfic, kind of a letter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-11
Updated: 2014-09-11
Packaged: 2018-02-17 00:23:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2290133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notacompletelunatic/pseuds/notacompletelunatic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the first time he could say he have a friend, but it's also the first time he could say that he's in love. Naruto has always been good to him, but bad for his already hurt heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I have love on my skin, but emptiness in my heart

**Author's Note:**

> Ohayou minna-san, I'm new here. This is the first fic I've ever posted so please be nice. I've tried my best and even if it sucks I'm happy for finally post something.  
> Open to critics, bad or good ones.  
> This is just some random idea I had while listening to Over and Over from 3DG.  
> Enjoy it and thank you for reading :)

I never had friends not even when I was a child, they all just hated me because of the monster I carried for the village's sake. I had never heard a 'thank you' or some kind word from my comrades. I wasn't someone they enjoyed to have in their village living so near, even if said person was the Kazekage's son. For them I wasn't a boy, a comrade not even a person, I was just the Jinchuuriki of the tailed beast that was responsible for all their grief and sadness, I also was the monster itself, I didn't have a personality or a life of my own, he and I, we were always connected, by chakra and hatred for all people and all things. We together hated everything in the world that didn't involved killing or blood, my bloodthirsty was almost as great as his, and for that the villagers saw only one being where it resided two. I hated so much to hear that I was even worse than the bijuu in my stomach that I killed the person who said it and all his family, it did not matter to me that there was a baby boy with them, if I didn't deserved to be loved why would he?  
My childhood was sad, it's all I need to say about it and I am sure that you'll understand. You're the only person in this entire unfair world that understands exactly how I feel. But I didn't understand you. Why you kept caring for Konoha if it never cared about you? You kept wanting to prove your strength and be recognized as a leaf nin like all the others. You already told me the reason, you showed me, I felt, literally, in my skin what you meant.  
I understand your reasons, but why? Why can't you leave this village was all I kept thinking until the kidnapping by Akatsuki and my almost death. Now I can say that I know your 'whys' and your 'becauses', now I know how it feels to be loved.  
But I still want the love of one person, and to be honest is the only one that I really wanted to love me since I met him. All my dreams about been loved was with only one man. You appeared in my dreams all nights, that was one of my favorite benefits of been without Shukaku sealed inside me, I could sleep and dream about you.  
I think even you realize what I mean by now, even you being the most dense person in the world. Love is such a strong word, and I know it better than anyone, it hurts too, I felt this pain in my own flesh, literally and subjectively. I learnt this last years that love is something that must be reciprocal, you must give and you shall receive, but you seem not to know that detail about that emotion.  
Why, Naruto? I really want to know the reason for you to love the one that has never shown you any kind of affection, he showed only hatred, disregard and disdain for all you have done for him. Why do you, the most kind and caring person of all, loves him, the man that only cares about his empty revenge and gaining power?  
He is your opposite. You are light, he is dark. You are love, he is hatred. You are life, he is death.  
Why can't you see that someone else loves you? Finally the hole -that is where my rock for a heart is being kept since I was a child and my uncle tried to murder me like all the other villagers- in my chest is full and the one responsible for it don't even realize it. And here I thought that nothing could hurt me after all the suffering that I felt for all my life. I discovered that some things can hurt even more than others. Now I have the love and care of all Suna and this don't make me feel complete nor satisfied, because, Naruto, I want your love, your caring, your concern. Why can't I have it and Uchiha Sasuke can?  
Does he care for you? Does he love you like I do? I sincerely hope for the yes, because you are the one that deserves all the love in this world, I wanted to give back the feeling that you gave me all those years ago when your forehead hit mine with all force that you could manage at the middle of the fight - in that time you were also fighting to protect the Uchiha-, that was the first time I felt my heart beat inside my empty chest full of desert sand.  
Maybe I am wrong, maybe he deserves your love and I do not, but I don't want to think that way cause this hurts even more than those villagers' looks and hatred words that cut deep inside my mortal flesh.  
I want you to love me, but Temari told me once that we can't have all we wish in this world, or it would be unfair with all the other people. Well, she's right, I am the Kazekage, the village admires me and the war is over, we won it and, more important, you are alive, I can't expect that more wishes come true, it would be indeed unfair. So, instead of one more wish of mine become true I want that what you wish the most come true. I know you can make Sasuke love you, after all you could make someone like me, who had never known what was love before, to love deeply for the first time.  
Suki desu Naruto.


End file.
